How to Make Friends in College (Even If You're Super Shy)

Let’s be honest no one teaches you how to start a conversation in a new city, in a room full of strangers. But this guide might just help you begin. 


So you finally made it to college. 🎓

New city, new classes, new chaos. You walk into the lecture hall, look around, and… everyone’s already in groups. Talking, laughing, vibing. And there you are pretending to text, heart racing, wishing you had someone to sit with.

Sound familiar?

Let me tell you something: you are not alone.

If you're introverted, shy, or socially awkward making friends in college can feel impossible. But it doesn’t have to be. You don’t need to be the loudest, the funniest, or the most confident person in the room. You just need to start. Slowly. Honestly. One awkward “hi” at a time.

And once you begin, you’ll be surprised how many people are also waiting, silently hoping, that someone else makes the first move.


1. Start With the Other Quiet People

The people sitting alone? They’re usually just like you. Not rude. Not unfriendly. Just unsure where to begin.

Look around. Find someone who looks a little lost, a little nervous, maybe clutching their bag like it’s emotional support. That’s your cue.

Say something like:

“Hey, I’m [Your Name]. Is this seat taken?”
“You’re in the same department, right?”

The conversation doesn’t need to be deep. It just needs to be kind.

Once during orientation, I sat beside a girl because she had the same water bottle as me. That five-minute chat led to lunch, which led to a friendship that still exists today. You never know what tiny moment could lead to something big.

Even if you don’t click? That’s okay. You showed courage. That counts.


2. Ask for Help (Even If You Know the Answer)

This may sound silly but it’s magic.

Asking for help makes you approachable. It lowers pressure. It makes others feel useful, and that’s a good thing.

Ask:

  • “Do you know which block the lab is in?”

  • “I heard there’s a WhatsApp group for this class. Are you in it?”

  • “Was attendance taken today? I came in late.”

It’s okay if you already know. You’re not faking anything you’re starting a connection.

And next time:

“Thanks again for the tip yesterday!”

Boom. Conversation #2, unlocked.

Over time, people may turn to you for help too and that opens more doors.


3. Don’t Wait for the “Right” Moment

There’s no perfect moment. No magical window where you’ll suddenly feel brave and everyone’s waiting to welcome you.

Waiting often becomes hiding. One day becomes one week. A week becomes a semester. And everyone already has a group.

It’ll always feel a bit awkward. That’s okay.

Say hi in the elevator. Compliment someone’s shoes. Ask about class notes. Make that first move even if your hands are sweaty.

People will be glad you spoke first. And more than you think, they’ll admire your guts.


4. Change Your Seat. Seriously.

Humans are creatures of habit. We sit in the same spot, eat at the same table, walk the same hallway.

Break that.

Sit somewhere new every few days. In class. At lunch. At events.

Even if you don’t talk to someone, they’ll start recognizing your face. And maybe next time, they say hi first.

Changing your physical space can open social opportunities you didn’t know existed.


5. Join Something (Even If You're Nervous)

Clubs and societies are goldmines.

Don’t aim to be the president. Just attend. Observe. Participate.

Love writing? Try the literature club. Want to dance but afraid to perform? Show up anyway. Prefer social work? NSS, maybe?

In these spaces, everyone has a shared interest. You don’t need to force small talk. You can let your passion speak first.

These interactions build shared memories and shared memories are the foundation of friendships.


6. Use This Magic Line: “Mind if I join?”

Simple. Respectful. Effective.

Spot a group in the canteen? A walk back from the library? Students huddled after a fest meeting?

“Hey, mind if I join?”

Most people will say yes. And even if they don’t seem friendly, don’t give up.

Keep trying. It’s not rejection. It’s redirection.

Confidence isn’t about never being rejected it’s about trying again anyway.


7. Be Real. Not Perfect.

Don’t worry about your English. Don’t try to be “cool.” Don’t copy someone else’s vibe.

Be you.

Share your love for Maggi. Your nervousness before viva. Your weekend Netflix obsession. Or how much you miss your hometown.

That’s how friendships form over realness, shared chaos, and mutual weirdness.

Let others see the honest version of you. That’s the one people will connect with.

You don’t need 50 friends. You need 2 or 3 real ones who get you.


8. Not Everyone Will Click And That’s Okay

This one sting, but it’s true.

You’ll meet people who seem great until they leave you out, ghost you, or don’t vibe.

And you’ll wonder, “What did I do wrong?”

Answer: nothing.

Some people just aren’t your people. And that’s okay. That’s not rejection. That’s space being cleared for better connections.

Let go. Keep showing up. Your real friends are out there and they’re worth the wait.


9. Friendship = Small Consistent Moments

You don’t need grand gestures.

You need:

  • Smiles

  • “How was your test?”

  • Sharing a meme

  • Offering a seat

  • Helping with notes

That’s it.

Small moments. Repeated often. That’s how friendship grows.

Be consistent. Be kind. Be present.


10. Hostel Life = Friendship Accelerator

Staying in a hostel? Congrats that’s a shortcut to bonding.

Where else do you:

  • Cook Maggi at 2 AM?

  • Rant about exams at midnight?

  • Share toothpaste and life advice?

Hostel life is raw, emotional, chaotic and unforgettable.

Even the fights over laundry create memories. That girl you argued with about bucket space. Could become your bridesmaid one day.

Say yes to late-night chai. To room visits. To silly gossip. That’s where the magic is.


💭 Final Words:

College isn’t just an academic journey it’s a soul-stretching, identity-shaking rollercoaster. It’s about meeting parts of yourself you didn’t know existed. About learning to live with uncertainty, embracing late-night breakdowns and breakthroughs, discovering your voice in crowded rooms, and slowly, tenderly, building your own version of adulthood.

If you feel lost, overwhelmed, or like everyone else has it figured out breathe. You're not behind. You're just beginning.
You’re almost adulting. And honestly? That’s the most beautiful, messy place to be. 🌱\

💬 Talk to Me:

What’s one thing YOU wish someone told you before college? Drop it in the comments, email me. Let’s build a space where being unsure is 100% normal.

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